surrogacy working with intended parents
Surrogacy Working With Intended Parents: Building the Relationship
Surrogacy working with intended parents successfully is about clear expectations, honest communication, and the agency's support as your guide. Most surrogates describe their relationship with intended parents as one of the most meaningful parts of the journey.
Quick Answer
- Communication expectations are set in your legal contract before any medical procedures begin
- Most surrogates and intended parents communicate via text, video call, and milestone updates
- Rocky Mountain Surrogacy acts as mediator and support when questions or conflicts arise
- International intended parents are common — time zones and language are accounted for from the start
How Communication Expectations Are Set
Before the embryo transfer, your legal contract spells out how you and the intended parents will communicate. Nothing is left to guesswork.
The contract covers how often you are in touch. It names which channels to use. It says what medical updates to share and who attends which appointments.
Both sides read every line before signing. You agree only to what feels right for you.
Rocky Mountain Surrogacy helps both sides say what they want during the contract process. If the intended parents want weekly updates, that goes in. If you prefer to share only at milestones, that is negotiated too.
The Office on Women's Health has resources on the emotional side of pregnancy that surrogates may find helpful.
Surrogacy working with intended parents starts with clear ground rules. The contract makes that clarity official.
Communication expectations are agreed on and signed before any medical procedures begin. You will always know what is expected of you.
Common Ways Surrogates and Intended Parents Stay Connected
Surrogacy working with intended parents often starts with simple, consistent contact.
Every match is different. But there are common patterns that work well.
Many surrogates send a weekly text update — just a line or two. Others share ultrasound photos or a short voice message when there is a milestone to report. Some intended parents join a key scan via video call.
Group chats work well for some matches. Private texting apps that keep things organized work for others. The agency does not dictate the channel — just the expectation that communication happens regularly and honestly.
Most surrogates find that a natural rhythm develops. You get a feel for how the intended parents communicate. They get a feel for yours. By the second trimester, most matches have settled into a pattern that works for everyone.
If communication starts to feel strained or one-sided, your coordinator steps in to help.
- Weekly text or photo updates at key milestones
- Video calls for major ultrasounds or special moments
- Private messaging apps for organized, ongoing contact
- Coordinator bridges any gaps or miscommunications
Meeting the Intended Parents for the First Time
When surrogacy working with intended parents reaches the first in-person (or video) meeting, it is a milestone.
The first time you meet the intended parents during your surrogacy is usually a video call.
Most surrogates meet their intended parents before the embryo transfer — often on a video call. Some matches arrange an in-person meeting if geography allows.
The first call is usually warm and low-pressure. You get to ask questions. So do they. The agency is often part of this initial introduction.
You are not required to immediately commit after the first call. Matching is a mutual decision. If the connection does not feel right, the agency finds another match for both sides.
Many surrogates describe this first meeting as one of the most touching moments of the process. You see why the intended parents need you. They see the kind of person they are trusting with something irreplaceable.
From that first call, most matches build a relationship that lasts well beyond delivery.
Matching is always mutual. If the connection does not feel right after the first call, the agency finds a better fit for both sides.
How to Start Your Surrogacy Journey
Surrogacy working with intended parents is one of the most rewarding parts of the whole journey. Many surrogates describe the family they helped create as a lifelong connection.
To get started, fill out a ten-minute online application. A real person reads it. If you look like a good fit, they schedule a call.
You must be 21 to 38, have a prior healthy pregnancy, have a healthy BMI, be a non-smoker, and be a U.S. citizen or permanent resident.
Rocky Mountain Surrogacy has been matching surrogates with intended parents since 2007. The agency was founded by Tess Hine — a gestational surrogate herself.
Apply to be a surrogate and take your first step.
- Apply online — about ten minutes, reviewed personally by the team
- Complete screening and get matched with an intended family
- Meet the intended parents on a call or in person
- Sign your contract with communication terms included
- Begin the journey together
Frequently Asked Questions
What if I don't get along with my intended parents?
Rocky Mountain Surrogacy matches you carefully based on your values and communication preferences. If a match does not feel right, the agency works with both sides to find a better fit — you are never locked into a match that does not work for you.
How much contact do surrogates have with intended parents?
Contact is defined in your legal contract. Most Rocky Mountain Surrogacy surrogates communicate weekly with texts or milestone updates, with video calls at key moments like major ultrasounds.
What about international intended parents?
Rocky Mountain Surrogacy regularly matches with families from Spain, Canada, Australia, the UK, and Brazil. The agency coordinates time zones, language differences, and international communication throughout your journey.
Does the agency stay involved throughout the pregnancy?
Yes — your Rocky Mountain Surrogacy coordinator stays with you from application through postpartum check-in. They facilitate communication, mediate any concerns, and are available 24/7 the entire time.